Using positive speech either personally or in public speaking is a choice. We live in a world filled with negative experiences. It is easy to get caught up and even emulate the negative world around us.
It is an even greater challenge when exposed to people who chose to use negative speech. Will it suck you in so that it consumes you and with out recognizing it, you frame all you say in the negative context?
Or will you take advantage of one of the biggest opportunities you will have to build your own credibility and the respect of the audience for you. Will you tap into a power that can move small and large groups of people?
That power can be realized by using positive speech and up building speech.
For some there is a paradoxical challenge with positive speech. They become so positive that they almost refuse to see bad in anything. Yet as with so many things in life, improvement only comes from honest and frank critiquing.
It is one thing to frame a negative circumstance like failure into a learning experience and another to refuse to recognize the failure all together and do nothing to improve.
How can we maintain positive speech in our every day conversation?
What if we’re negative in what we say and want to change?
How can we deal with others who are negative speakers?What balance between the negative and positive speech is needed when giving a lecture? How can balance be attained?
We live in a world that thrives on negative news and reports. We cannot close our eyes or ears to the reality. However, in our speech and public speaking, we can usually limit the negative information.
Informative, persuasive or motivational speeches should be refreshing. How refreshing would a lukewarm glass of water be compared to ice cold water. Both will satisfy hydration needs of the body. The cool one offers refreshment, the warm only hydration.
Positive and up building information tends to be more refreshing. It is more palatable. It is the mind we want to refresh. We should avoid anything that might repress.
More importantly, limit that which would depress. How do you feel when you go to a funeral home for a viewing? What kind of mood do you notice? What do you feel? What kind of conversations would you hear?
Might you hear the sounds of mourning? Perhaps even greater effect if a young person or baby has died. Just as the mood permeates the feelings of everyone there, so to, unless you limit the negative, the same negative emotions could well up in the minds of the audience. That negative experience will close their minds.
Try this as an experiment to open your mind. Can you see anything positive in a funeral viewing? There are some obvious benefits.
One of the biggest, it allows us to view and appreciate relationships we now have with those who are still alive. Are we doing all we can to maintain and keep them strong? Do we use positive speech in our daily conversations? Do we try to build on those relationships?
Sometimes negative information may be necessary. In saying that, what positive benefit does including it have?
Can it be framed into a positive experience?
Do we learn a lesson or moral?
Will it help with avoiding future mistakes or loss?
Make sure it is on point, on purpose, and brief. It is not necessary to provide a gory detailed mental picture for your audience. If this is your challenge, attempt to mix the negative with the positive speech so that the resulting presentation is up building and encouraging.
It can be illustrated as my CPA told me almost 30 years ago.
Regarding treasury agents, he said they don’t study counterfeit money. There would be millions of them to have to learn. There would a constant flow of new ones to study. They only study the real thing. That way when they see a counterfeit, they can recognize it right away.
People don't need to be reminded that we live in a world full of negative experiences. Those experiences like the counterfeit money, are too numerous and do not require review to recognize they exist.
However the one positive message, like the real money, will be readily recognized by the audience. They will know the encouraging and up building when they hear it.
Start by using positive speech and up building speaking in your every day speech.
Catch people doing something right and compliment. Avoid flattery.
Every day, set a quota of people to find and compliment for some excellence they demonstrate.
Even correction of negative conduct could be framed as positive commendation.
Commend the person into the conduct you want them to have.
Read Welcome To The Club
A true story of dealing with a culture of complaining.
Try responding to the greeting of how are you doing with… (choose one)Excellent, fantastic, or wonderful but getting better.
To train you mind if you have a challenge overcoming negative speech about your self or others.
Every time you find your self saying something negative about someone else try to find two positive things about them to say. This is an excellent tool to for couples to use with each other in their personal conversation.
More than once people have come up to my wife and I telling us they were impressed that we never had anything bad to say about anyone.
Making conservation positive and up building starts with you, in your personal and every day speech.
If you make a mistake, if you’re negative in some way, if you tear someone down, be the first to admit the mistake and apologize for it. Again, this will go a long way to build the respect for you in the eyes of your colleagues. This will also start a culture of positive speech with those you work with.
At the end of the day, make a mental review of your actions and speech. If you see areas where you could have better used positive speech and up building speaking, briefly in your mind relive the conversation only in the positive context.
Public Positive Speech and Speaking.
Make it your credo, never to say anything that is not positive and up building about anyone. You will learn, if you haven’t so far, this world is a very small place and something you say will come back and bite you if you’re not careful.
Never say anything negative about the competition. If you do, you may look like the only way you can elevate yourself if by bashing them. There are always some redeeming qualities, traits or abilities the competition has if only to give you a run for the money. Find something to praise them for or don’t say anything at all.
Positive speech is not just something to practice in daily life, it is a requirement from the platform.
If you always use positive speech and up building speech you will yield rich rewards. Those rewards will come from both the audience who will grow in respect for you and possibly from the competition. You just never know, you may be working for them some day. It could be that positive speech could pay off for you.
There are other payoffs too. They are in the form of credibility. Never refer to anyone or thing any derogatory term. It is the biggest credibility killer you can use. When you hear someone calling another person a moron, you may have found your self thinking it takes one to know one.
Be careful, for even in that thought, you have just judged someone. Rather you might look at their inappropriate comments as indicating they are not your cup of tea.
When appropriate, commend the audience during the presentation. If you can add the views of management relating to that commendation add that too. However, care needs to be exercised that it not be flattery.
If you’re exercising your positive speech skills, you will find this to be the most dynamic area in the positive feed back you will receive. It is here, you will have power to shape the lives of those you work and live with every day.
May all of your utterances be positive speech and up building speaking.